It’s no secret that men can be a little… “uninformed” when it comes to women and relationships. Men like to tout it as women being “too complicated”, but the fact of the matter is that most men just don’t listen to what their partners are actually saying, or take the time to think about what their actions convey.
We bet all the men reading this are scratching their heads in confusion right about now.
Well, don’t you worry, our handsome-yet-clueless other halves. We’re here to spell it out for you, so listen up! We know we’re not the only ones who are longing to find that special someone we can grow old with. We know your intentions are pure, even if it doesn’t always show on the outside. We know you love your wife, even if you have trouble showing it at times.
With a few simple “guidelines”, you can make your wife feel like a queen, and make her feel like there’s no way she can ever leave you. Get the (emotional) shackles and chains ready, because we’re about to spill the beans.
Here’s the secret to making your marriage last:
Yeah, it’s as simple as that.
Remember how we said that men saying things like “women are too complicated”, or “I never know what she wants” are BS?
The only reason you think that is because you don’t listen to your woman! The truth is that she’s constantly telling you what she wants, all you have to do shut your brain off to the outside world for just a few moments and actually hear the words coming out of her mouth.
2. Put You Ego Aside
Ego is one of the biggest issues in a relationship. If you’re constantly making your partner feel like she’s lesser than you, it’s definitely not going to last. Of course, putting your ego aside is a two-way street, but maybe it’s time for men to take the first step.
Women have spent decades feeling less important to men, so she might have trouble letting go before you now that she finally feels like she’s on equal footing. Trust us, if you come down from your high horse, she will follow automatically.
3. Bite Your Tongue
As a regular human being, it’s natural that you feel angry at some point or the other. Even the most in-love couples have their rough patches, trust us. But the difference between a failed marriage and one that ends with side-by-side graves is that the latter manages to control their rage.
A good tip to keep your from anger affecting your marriage is to leave the room immediately when something negative is bubbling inside you. You might say something you do not mean when angry, and will definitely regret later. Give yourself time to cool down and think of things you need to say in a calm manner.
Listening to your spouse is very important, but so is communicating. How is she supposed to know what you want or how you feel if you do not tell her? She is NOT a mind reader.
If you’re harboring negative feelings, she will feel it and will naturally distance herself from you if you do not explain what is going on. Whoever said it wasn’t “manly” to talk about feelings was an idiot, and definitely not a good husband.
5. Make Every Day Feel Special
Celebrating anniversaries and birthdays might all be good and well, but it can feel a bit forced when you only make an effort to make her feel special on such designated days. It almost becomes like you’re putting on a show for the rest of the world, so you can show you friends and family on social media how good of a husband you are.
Instead, make every day she spends with you a dream. We’re not asking you to take her out to fancy restaurants or buy her jewelry on the daily. But an occasional chocolate bar on your way home, or drawing her a hot bath at the end of a hectic day can make her feel like the queen of your world.
6. Focus on the Resolution
When you’re faced with a problem or if there’s something that both of you disagree on, the best thing to do is focus on the resolution instead of the conflict. Ask yourselves “what can we do to come to an agreement that we’re both happy with?” Take some time to think about it if you need to, and talk it out like mature adults.
7. Know Your Wife
You might be thinking we’re crazy to suggest you don’t know your wife. But do you really know all of her? Do you know why she gets upset when she does, how to make her feel better, or what her love language is?
If you said no, you need to do a serious relationship revamp. Even if you said yes, if you aren’t acting in accordance with those things, then there’s no point in it. Know your wife, know all her highs and lows and know her missing spots so you can fill them up like two pieces of a jigsaw puzzle.
8. Never Compare Her To Your Ex
This is one of the biggest no-nos in a relationship. Never, ever compare your wife to any of your exes. It won’t do you any good, and it will make her doubt your relationship because it tells her you’re still thinking about a past relationship.
Even if you think you’re making her look better by comparing her to an ex, just don’t.
Sometimes, conflict resolution might require compromise. There’s no relationship that can last without compromise. When two individuals decide to build one life together, they aren’t going to agree on everything. There are times that you will need to compromise on what you want for the greater good.
Compromises should be reached equally, but it certain situations, you might have to give her a little more leeway. The next time, she’ll do the same for you and so on.
10. Accept All of Her
You love your wife, or you wouldn’t have married her (probably). While there are sure to be many things that you absolutely love about her, chances are there are a few things you’re not too crazy about. That’s fine too, but the important thing is that you accept her flaws as well as her good qualities.
Don’t try to change her, or “mould” her into your perfect woman. She is perfect the way she is, and you need to understand and accept that.